hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
