Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
