i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize
