I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
