I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Randomize
