She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
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