My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Randomize
