Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Randomize
