he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
