You're completely useless in the revolution.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
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