she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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