Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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