You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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