One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
