I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Randomize
