no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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