we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
