question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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