Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
i love accidental penises.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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