It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
if only i could text you this smell
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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