pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Randomize
