i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
Randomize
