Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Randomize
