I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
