if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
