Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
