Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize
