YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
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