what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
