is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
