Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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