sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
