Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
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