You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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