I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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