i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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