Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
