But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
You smell like stripper and shame
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
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