She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
