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Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
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