Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
