dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize