...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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