mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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