I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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