i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
When did we convert life to cartoon?
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Randomize
