BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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