woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize
