Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
