I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
